I THINK I GOT IT

I know grief is selfish. I know God is going to take care of me. Here's what else I've figured out. I think my grief will continue as long as there are things that I havent thought about yet. For instance, I totally lost it today thinking about my dad's cooking. He was so aggravating about it because he never used a recipe. He was a really good cook! He would take little old spaghetti and turn it into something you wanted to eat for 4 days straight...and it got better as the days went on. He could make the best lemon pound cake, it was so moist yet it had a crunchy sugary top. I even remember him trying out recipes from the Valdosta Daily Times' Cookbook before the contest would even take place. He had his standards that he would make to take to grandma's for the holidays. So when I realized today that no one cooks like my dad and I have no way of replicating anything he did, it upset me. That's when I thought...one day I will have cried over the loss of all the things I won't get to have with my dad or because of my dad or having to do with my dad. Then hopefully the memories will become sweet and precious. Until then, please bear with me. I miss him so much!