She was showcasing the cute earrings I got her!
They are just too cute!

Sam and Kristy looked extra adorable on Sunday so I had to take their pictures.

Chris was trying so diligently to get the girls to sing Happy Birthday, but I think they were over the whole birthday thing after all the ones we had in September. They do know how to count to 12 and if you ask them what month it is they will tell you October! I'm proud.

Happy Birthday to the best sister in law ever! Thank you for being my friend and the sister I always wanted. Thank you for being a great wife, loving and supporting my brother. Thank you for giving me the most precious nieces! Thank you for being a wonderful part of our family! I love you and wish you the best birthday yet!


Fran Lee and Gavin Misner had their engagement party Sat Oct 25th. It was great being able to meet Gavin and hang out with Fran again!
Susanna Martin, Nicole Steel and Fran

Elizabeth Oliver(wow, that's the first time I've written her new name), Fran, and me


Saturday Oct 18, 2008

Amanda and me
Emily(Junior), Emily, and me

me and Tara(she's sporting her new beautiful brunette hair!)

Jake(Tara's boyfriend, who lets me call him my boyfriend)
Mary Alison was tailgating with her family. She rather enjoyed making a mess with her orange cupcake!

Alison(Mary Alison's mom) and I had a great time catching up!

I knew my uncle used to be a KA but I had never seen his composite picture in the KA house before. I was tickled and ofcourse had to take a picture!

My friend Anne and I have been working so hard on the Merry Marketplace Preview Party. It was great to get to see her and not have to talk about MM.

Quinn walked by our tailgate and I couldnt resist the photo opp!

Angie and I at the back of the KA house. Jay thought he would be funny by getting in the pic sort of like a Where's Waldo kind of thing.

It was a beautiful day- the sun was shining, the weather was cool and good friends were all around! Not to mention the Blazers won the football game!


So obviously I rarely write about my feelings anymore. I just try not to have them, feelings that is. I am trying to continue living my life. But if you say my dad's name or anything about him, I will cry. It's just something I have learned to accept. (and hope that other's will too) I will always miss my dad. I miss being able to play cards after Sunday lunch. Dad was always up for a challenge and Aunt Susie is usually up for whatever anyone wants to do. It might seem like a trivial thing, but it was our chance to talk and spend time together. I loved calling dad at work to ask him about trivial things. They were things I didnt have the answer for and I knew he would. Even if he was busy or tired he would always stop to listen. My friend Kathi had a star named after dad and gave me a charm with his name and the location of the star engraved on it. If you look on the constellation map, the star is in "Big Bear". I laughed through my tears when I read it. He was my big teddy bear. Don't get me wrong, he had his moments. He had a temper at times and could get quite anger whenever I disobeyed him or something at work wasnt how it should be. But for the most part, my dad was my big teddy bear...he could hug me like no one could, he could joke with me and threaten me (usually about paying for my car) but I always knew my dad was my protector. He loved me and supported me. He always told me growing up that my brother and I would never go without something (within reason-like a church ski trip or various camps) because of money. He worked extra security jobs so we could do those things. He even had a separate banking account for our Christmas money. He and I would go shopping together for my mom and sister in laws presents, although he did most of the picking out stuff. He had a special time set aside to go to Aunt Susie's house and she would wrap our presents as he would write out the to and from stickers. I thought it was cute that he would put from Santa on some of my presents and from mom & dad on the others. Dad used to tell me that if I didnt make a list to Santa that I would not get any presents. I would make him a list and always go to Steel's and make a wish list. He would usually buy everything on it! He used to be so proud of how Susan would help him and make sure he had everything he needed. He even bought his clerks earrings from there for Christmas last year. I am sad for Ella Grace and Emma. I think he wouldve been for them what he was for me. He was so elated when he found out he was going to be a Papa. He told everyone at his office. Then when he found out it was twin girls he got 2 pink frosted doughnuts put on top of the usual order and wrote on the box that it signified the sex of his soon to be grandchildren. (He ordered doughnuts for his staff every Friday) He wore a pink Polo on the day they were born. He would go see them a lot and loved getting sugar from them. I think last Christmas he bought out the children's store in Lake Park. I hope to tell them all these stories some day.
Wow, I really miss him. I will always have a hole in my heart with his name on it. That hole is where he would constantly restock his love each time I saw or talked to him. I am lonely. I guess I never realized how much his love made me feel special and wanted. I know God loves me unconditionally and He can fill my void. I just figured I would always have my daddy as the earthly man in my life until God saw fit to give me a husband. Right now I have neither and am having a small pity party. (I admitted it was a pity party, so no comments about that)
I finally decided to implement more discipline in my life. It's a spiritual lesson I struggle with. I thought I'd start out with the area I have the most trouble with: exercising! My friend Kari Anne and I have gone to the track at 6am every day this week. She's running, I'm walking. However, I am moving. I am determined to lose weight and feel better about myself. I am still not a morning person. In fact, when I get home from working out, I get back in the bed until I have to get up. One of the perks of owning your own business is making your own hours!! So I guess I told you all that so that hopefully one of you reading, would GENTLY hold me accountable.
That's about all I have to say. If you just want to look on my blog for pictures, that's fine. However, if you do care about "how I'm doing" then you will read the posts that have no pictures. I'm fine with it either way.
Love to you all!


me and Addie
We always have a good time when we get together. These pictures were taken at Kari Anne's house at our get together in July.
Brooke and baby Rylin and Libby and baby Addie

You have been such a great friend to me over the 20+ years. I am so grateful to God to have you in my life!I hope you have a very happy and blessed birthday!
Love you always,


Fear is a technique the ememy loves to use. Just think about it. How many times have you backed away from witnessing to someone, or changing jobs, or moving, or making big life decisions because of fear. We fear the unknown. We fear the unknown outcome, whether good or bad. I havent really blogged about my feelings lately. I guess I've been too busy trying to supress them for FEAR that letting them out again will just bring on another cycle of pain. So today I am going to talk about my fears in hopes of helping someone else and maybe myself. I got upset at church about 2 weeks ago because someone asked me if "it" was getting easier. I told her no and started crying and had to walk away. I don't think things will ever be "easy" or "better" or "okay". I will always have the loss of my dad floating around in my heart and in my head. The truth of the matter is that I am doing a little better. I still cry, but not as often and not as hard. But my fear was that in admitting that I was doing a little better that I was somehow forgetting my dad or was getting over his death which in my brain meant it didnt matter anymore. It does matter. It will always matter. I can't pass a VPD without thinking about him. Everyday my mom walks in my house, I think about how he should be here. I think God is just giving me the grace to deal with it now. That same woman's husband told me this week that I seemed happy and they were thankful for that. I ofcourse started crying as I tried to admit to him and myself that I am happy. I am living my life for the only man in my life, God. I've come to the realization that this is my life. I can't change it. I can only make best of what's left of it. I just wish people understood that I miss him and sometimes thats gonna make me sad.
This would be the week that he would sit out at Valdosta High School for Winnersville week. He would always ask me what the membership number to the video store was so he could go rent some movies to occupy his time. (He never could remember that number) He would sleep during the day. I would always be cautious not to wake him if I came over to the house. He would go out to the highschool and sit in his car from 10pm to 6am making sure none of the town rivals would come damage the property. Then after it was all said and done, the family would get to here all the stories of the not so smart kids he scared away from the school and the few smart kids who waited for him to leave before they did something. PS, it made me want to cry when I found out that students had graffitied it this week.
So back to my fear. My best friends dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer a couple of weeks ago. It was a tremendous blow when I found out. I immediately went into preservation mode. I wouldnt allow myself to think about the what ifs. I knew I needed to be strong for my best friend. I just kept telling myself he will survive this, he has to survive this, and then ultimately telling God that He couldnt take her daddy. (now I know God can do whatever He wants, but this was my emotional rationalization with God at the time) Praise the Lord, her dad's cancer has not spread anywhere else and he has a great surgeon. I also know who the Great Physician is! I just mention this because I would like all my readers to pray for him and his family.
Yesterday I found out about a girl I went to high school with having breast cancer. She is my age with 2 children under 3. In talking with another friend about this girl she said the girl was scared about who would raise her children and ect. I just thought to myself she should just treasure every second she has with them and not allow herself to go to the fears of the what ifs. (Yall can pray for her too) I wish I had had the chance to enjoy every last moment with my dad. I wish I couldve taken one more picture or hugged him one more time. But I didnt get that chance and so now I am trying to take each day like it is truly a gift and I'm trying to not let my fears get the best of me. It has been 6 months today. I kept myself busy with work and tried to get myself a ticket to the game tonight, but that didnt pan out. I wouldnt say this day has been the greatest for my emotions, but I am surviving and I guess that's all that matters.


We started off on Friday at Charlie Trippers for the Bridesmaids Luncheon. It was such a beautiful day out.

Liz and her maid of honor, Fran Lee.
Liz with her niece Gwenyth after she opened her presents for being the flower girl.
ok , i know Liz's eyes were closed, but it was the only pic we took at the bridesmaids luncheon together.
Meredith Bechtel and I grew up together and it was so great being able to hang out with her for an entire weekend! I will be very sad when her family moves to Macon.

The rehearsal: This is the choir loft of the church in Quitman where the honorary bridesmaids and groomsmen sat. The preacher said we looked like a "pretty jury"
Liz and her dad practicing walking down the aisle.
Max and Liz
Liz's Aunt Betty is a trip. She can play the piano like no one's business and was a great source of entertainment!
Jessica and I became instant friends a while back and had a great time hanging out with each other this weekend. Too bad she doesnt live in Valdosta!

The Dinner:
I love Rose and Patrick Kerns!!! Rose and her family have been so great to me over the years and now Rose and I are great friends! I was so excited they came to the dinner. Patrick actually built the plantation where the dinner was.
Liz and I will always be the best of friends no matter where life takes us!

Yustega Plantation...I know the picture is blurry but the house is just so beautiful. It has such southern charm and elegance.
Liz and her mom
Me and Fran Lee...Fran's mom, Alicia West Lee is from Hopeful right around the corner from where my mom grew up! Too small of a world.
Thomas & Leigh Walker
Ceil Parramore, Fran Lee, me and Jessie Newman at the dinner

Picture time:

Isn't she beautiful?!!!
Liz's other niece, Shelby
The church was tiny but had such great character.

Liz taking a breather before the cermony begins.
Sisters in law
I love you friend!!
Me and Nicole go way back!
Gwenyth was eating a little snack with her cousin Jessie

The Reception:
We rode a "party bus" to the reception.
We just couldnt get away from each other, lol!
High School friends, Lauren, Meredith, and Leigh
Max and Liz sharing a moment with all 15 of us looking on. hehe
John Ashley and Ceil Parramore

Ok these ladies are very infamous. Amy King. Rebecca Moseley. me and Wendy Tillman. I knew when we took this picture it was going to be on the blog and so they needed a good story to go with. Whether they know it or not, these ladies have blessed me through different time periods of my life and I am thankful for their godly wisdom. I am so glad my camera still had some battery juice left so we could take this picture! Love you Ladies!
Their first dance
The scenery at the lodge was just beautiful. It screamed fall, but in the most elegant of ways.
me, Ceil, April, Nicole, and Jessie
I mean look how pretty! (and I dont even like orange)

The buffet was so pretty and so good! The menu was Thanksgiving dinner and it was amazing. I will be ordering some from Covington's to take to my family on Thanksgiving. (not quite up to cooking any of dad's masterpieces just yet)